Proverbs, aphorisms, quotations (English) | by Linux fortune |
Over the shoulder supervision is more a need of the manager than the programming task. | |
FORTUNE EXPLAINS WHAT JOB REVIEW CATCH PHRASES MEAN: #1 skilled oral communicator: Mumbles inaudibly when attempting to speak. Talks to self. Argues with self. Loses these arguments. skilled written communicator: Scribbles well. Memos are invariable illegible, except for the portions that attribute recent failures to someone else. growth potential: With proper guidance, periodic counselling, and remedial training, the reviewee may, given enough time and close supervision, meet the minimum requirements expected of him by the company. key company figure: Serves as the perfect counter example. | |
Theory of Selective Supervision: The one time in the day that you lean back and relax is the one time the boss walks through the office. | |
Q: What's the difference between Bell Labs and the Boy Scouts of America? A: The Boy Scouts have adult supervision. | |
Supervisor: Do you think you understand the basic ideas of Quantum Mechanics? Supervisee: Ah! Well, what do we mean by "to understand" in the context of Quantum Mechanics? Supervisor: You mean "No", don't you? Supervisee: Yes. -- Overheard at a supervision. | |
Excerpts From The First Annual Nerd Bowl (#5) A commercial that aired during the live ASCII broadcast of the game: Having trouble staying awake for weeks at a time working on that latest hack? Worried that some young punk will take over your cushy job because you sleep too much? Don't worry, EyeOpener® brand cola is here to save the day. You'll never feel sleepy again when you drink EyeOpener®. Surgeon General's Warning: This product should only be used under a doctor's immediate supervision, as it contains more caffeine than 512 cases of Coca-Cola. Caution: When sleep does occur after about three weeks, optometrists recommend having someone on hand to close your eyelids. Coming soon: ExtremelyWired(tm) cola with 50% more sugar! May or may not meet FDA approval... we're still trying. | |
In Tulsa, Oklahoma, it is against the law to open a soda bottle without the supervision of a licensed engineer. |