|Proverbs, aphorisms, quotations (English)||by Linux fortune|
|Microsoft ActivePromo Campaign: "Windows Competitive Upgrade Offer"|
Microsoft's PR masterminds are planning a massive marketing campaign,
code-named "ActivePromo 2000", to promote the upcoming release of Windows
2000 (scheduled for February 2001). This marketing campaign will include a
"Windows Competitive Upgrade Offer" promotion.
Users of non-Microsoft operating systems (Linux in particular) will be given
the opportunity to trade-in their present OS for a free copy of Windows 98
(or NT 4.0) and Office 97. People (all three of them) who want to
participate in this program will have to:
1. Mail their operating system's floppy disks or CD-ROMs to Microsoft
2. Agree to a two year contract with the Microsoft Network.
3. Agree (in writing) to the Competitive Upgrade License Agreement; one of
the terms of which is that the user may not install, copy, or otherwise use
a non-Microsoft OS for five years.
|Jargon Coiner (#12)|
An irregular feature that aims to give you advance warning of new jargon
that we've just made up.
* IPO (I've Patented the Obvious): Acquiring patents on trivial things and
then hitting other companies over the head with them.
Example: "Amazon just IPO'd one-click spam and is now ready to sue B&N."
* IPO (I'm Pissed Off): Exclamation given by a Linux user who was unable
to participate in a highly lucrative Linux IPO due to lack of capital or
E*Trade problems. Also uttered by Linux hackers who did not receive The
Letter from Red Hat or VA Linux even though their friends did.
* YAKBA (Yet Another Killer Backhoe Attack): The acronym that describes
network outtages caused by a careless backhoe operator.
Examples: "Don't blame us, our website was offline after we suffered a
YAKBA". "Don't worry about Y2K, what we need to think about is
A large number of turkies [sic] went to San Francisco yesterday by
the two o'clock boats. If their object in going down was to participate in
the Thanksgiving festivities of that city, they would arrive "the day after
the affair," and of course be sadly disappointed thereby.
-- Sacramento Daily Union, November 29, 1861
|I either want less decadence or more chance to participate in it.|
|Most people want either less corruption or more of a chance to|
participate in it.
|What we need is either less corruption, or more chance to participate in it.|
|We are all born charming, fresh and spontaneous and must be civilized|
before we are fit to participate in society.
-- Judith Martin, "Miss Manners' Guide to Excruciatingly