|Proverbs, aphorisms, quotations (English)||by Linux fortune|
|Extract from Official Sweepstakes Rules:|
NO PURCHASE REQUIRED TO CLAIM YOUR PRIZE
To claim your prize without purchase, do the following: (a) Carefully
cut out your computer-printed name and address from upper right hand
corner of the Prize Claim Form. (b) Affix computer-printed name and
address -- with glue or cellophane tape (no staples or paper clips) --
to a 3x5 inch index card. (c) Also cut out the "No" paragraph (lower
left hand corner of Prize Claim Form) and affix it to the 3x5 card
below your address label. (d) Then print on your 3x5 card, above your
computer-printed name and address the words "CARTER & VAN PEEL
SWEEPSTAKES" (Use all capital letters.) (e) Finally place 3x5 card
(without bending) into a plain envelope [NOTE: do NOT use the the
Official Prize Claim and CVP Perfume Reply Envelope or you may be
disqualified], and mail to: CVP, Box 1320, Westbury, NY 11595. Print
this address correctly. Comply with above instructions carefully and
completely or you may be disqualified from receiving your prize.
Get a can of shaving cream, throw it in a freezer for about a week.
Then take it out, peel the metal off and put it where you want...
bedroom, car, etc. As it thaws, it expands an unbelievable amount.
|The adjective is the banana peel of the parts of speech.|
-- Clifton Fadiman
|Glogg (a traditional Scandinavian holiday drink):|
fifth of dry red wine
fifth of Aquavit
1 and 1/2 inch piece of cinnamon
10 cardamom seeds
1 cup raisins
4 dried figs
1 cup blanched or flaked almonds
a few pieces of dried orange peel
1/2 lb. sugar cubes
Heat up the wine and hard stuff (which may be substituted with wine
for the faint of heart) in a big pot after adding all the other stuff EXCEPT
the sugar cubes. Just when it reaches boiling, put the sugar in a wire
strainer, moisten it in the hot brew, lift it out and ignite it with a match.
Dip the sugar several times in the liquid until it is all dissolved. Serve
hot in cups with a few raisins and almonds in each cup.
N.B. Aquavit may be hard to find and expensive to boot. Use it only
if you really have a deep-seated desire to be fussy, or if you are of Swedish
|The amount of time between slipping on the peel and landing on the|
pavement is precisely 1 bananosecond.
|Life is like an onion: you peel it off one layer at a time, and sometimes|
-- Carl Sandburg
|Life is like an onion: you peel off layer after layer and then you find|
there is nothing in it.
-- James Huneker
|"For a couple o' pins," says Troll, and grins,|
"I'll eat thee too, and gnaw thy shins.
A bit o' fresh meat will go down sweet!
I'll try my teeth on thee now.
Hee now! See now!
I'm tired o' gnawing old bones and skins;
I've a mind to dine on thee now."
But just as he thought his dinner was caught,
He found his hands had hold of naught.
Before he could mind, Tom slipped behing
And gave him the boot to larn him.
Warn him! Darn him!
A bump o' the boot on the seat, Tom thoguht,
Would be the way to larn him.
But harder than stone is the flesh and bone
Of a troll that sits in the hills alone.
As well set your boot to the mountain's root,
For the seat of a troll don't feel it.
Peel it! Heal it!
Old Troll laughed, when he heard Tom groan,
And he knew his toes could feel it.
Tom's leg is game, since home he came,
And his bootless foot is lasting lame;
But Troll don't care, and he's still there
With the bone he boned from its owner.
Troll's old seat is still the same,
And the bone he boned from its owner!
-- J. R. R. Tolkien