|Proverbs, aphorisms, quotations (English)
||by Linux fortune
|The last time I looked, Solaris and AIX and all the rest of the "scalable"|
systems were absolute pigs on smaller hardware, and the "scalability" in
them often translates into "we scale linearly to many CPU's by being
really bad even on one".
- Linus Torvalds
|Alan Cox Releases Quantum Kernel|
Submitted by Dave Finton
A surprising development in the linux-kernel mailing list surfaced when
Alan Cox announced the release of a 2.2 Linux kernel existing both as an
official stable kernel and as a prepatch kernel. This immediately spurred
the creation of two different realities (and hence two different Alan
Coxes), where a kernel would not settle down to one or the other state
until someone looked at it.
"I think this resulted from the large number of 'final' prepatch kernels
prior to the 2.2.14 release," said David Miller, kernel networking guru
and gas station attendent (he'll settle down to one or the other state
when someone looks at him).
When word of this development spread to Microsoft, Bill Gates was
extremely delighted. The Redmond, WA campus has been plagued with quantum
fluctuations ever since the inception of Windows 2000 back in 1992. "Our
release date has been existing in infinitely many states since the very
beginning," said a Microsoft spokesperson. "This just shows the Linux
operating system cannot scale to multiple realities as well as our OS."
|The temperature of the aqueous content of an unremittingly ogled|
culinary vessel will not achieve 100 degrees on the Celsius scale.
|Periphrasis is the putting of things in a round-about way. "The cost may be|
upwards of a figure rather below 10m#." is a periphrasis for The cost may be
nearly 10m#. "In Paris there reigns a complete absence of really reliable
news" is a periphrasis for There is no reliable news in Paris. "Rarely does
the 'Little Summer' linger until November, but at times its stay has been
prolonged until quite late in the year's penultimate month" contains a
periphrasis for November, and another for lingers. "The answer is in the
negative" is a periphrasis for No. "Was made the recipient of" is a
periphrasis for Was presented with. The periphrasis style is hardly possible
on any considerable scale without much use of abstract nouns such as "basis,
case, character, connexion, dearth, description, duration, framework, lack,
nature, reference, regard, respect". The existence of abstract nouns is a
proof that abstract thought has occurred; abstract thought is a mark of
civilized man; and so it has come about that periphrasis and civilization are
by many held to be inseparable. These good people feel that there is an almost
indecent nakedness, a reversion to barbarism, in saying No news is good news
instead of "The absence of intelligence is an indication of satisfactory
-- Fowler's English Usage
|"I think the sky is blue because it's a shift from black through purple|
to blue, and it has to do with where the light is. You know, the
farther we get into darkness, and there's a shifting of color of light
into the blueness, and I think as you go farther and farther away from
the reflected light we have from the sun or the light that's bouncing
off this earth, uh, the darker it gets ... I think if you look at the
color scale, you start at black, move it through purple, move it on
out, it's the shifting of color. We mentioned before about the stars
singing, and that's one of the effects of the shifting of colors."
-- Pat Robertson, The 700 Club
|How doth the little crocodile|
Improve his shining tail,
And pour the waters of the Nile
On every golden scale!
How cheerfully he seems to grin,
How neatly spreads his claws,
And welcomes little fishes in,
With gently smiling jaws!
-- Lewis Carrol, "Alice in Wonderland"
|I thought there was something fishy about the butler. Probably a Pisces,|
working for scale.
-- Firesign Theatre, "The Further Adventures of Nick Danger"
|Economies of scale:|
The notion that bigger is better. In particular, that if you want
a certain amount of computer power, it is much better to buy one
biggie than a bunch of smallies. Accepted as an article of faith
by people who love big machines and all that complexity. Rejected
as an article of faith by those who love small machines and all
On a scale of 1 to 10 I'd say... oh, somewhere in there.
| Rate yourself on the nerd-o-matic scale. (1 point for each YES answer)|
0-2 -- You are really hip, a real cool cat, a hoopy frood.
3-5 -- There is hope for you yet.
6-7 -- Uh-oh, trouble in River City.
8-10 -- Your immortal soul is in peril.
11+ -- Does suicide seem attractive?
|Well, he didn't know what to do, so he decided to look at the government,|
to see what they did, and scale it down and run his life that way.
-- Laurie Anderson
|There are three infallible ways of pleasing an author, and the three form a|
rising scale of compliment: 1, to tell him you have read one of his books; 2,
to tell him you have read all of his books; 3, to ask him to let you read the
manuscript of his forthcoming book. No. 1 admits you to his respect; No. 2
admits you to his admiration; No. 3 carries you clear into his heart.
-- Mark Twain, "Pudd'nhead Wilson's Calendar"
No guarantee of accuracy or completeness!
©TU Chemnitz, 2006-2013